Inner Thoughts of the Watermelon Radish
Fandom: The Bible
“‘shit why am i in space.’ Jesus wondered.”
Fandom: Left 4 Dead 2
“‘SHE’S LOST TOO MUCH BLOOD AND SHE HAS NO PULSE. THE DEFIB WILL WORK.’ Nick said. ‘IT’LL MAGICALLY GIVE HER BLOOD BACK BY REPLACING HER BLOOD WITH ELECTRICITY SO THEN SHE’LL SHOOT LAZERS OUT OF HER EYES.’”
So… That’s how it works. Huh.
Belisarius - 6th century Byzantine general.
A general to Justinian the Great, he worked wonders against the Persians, suppressed the Nika revolt, and in North Africa he recaptured Carthage from the Vandals. He was the last to receive a Roman Triumph [for said action in Carthage], not to mention being one of the last men to receive the office of Consul.
In the campaign to retake Italy from the Ostrogoths, he captured Naples, Rome & Milan, and when offered the title of Western Emperor by the Ostrogoths, feigned acceptance in order to take their capital, Ravenna, unopposed.
Greatness breeds contempt, and he faced much contempt indeed from those in positions to make his life difficult. In the field he would be starved of troops and resources, back in Constantinople he was stripped of his wealth, estate, and command (though Justinian ‘forgave’ him later). At every turn his wife cuckolded him publicly - egged on by Theodora.
His victories were his own, his defeats were the work of court eunuchs and harlots. I want nothing more than to mother him and tell him ‘history will judge you well, o history-buddy’. A true servant of Rome.
Elizabeth Siddal (1829-1862), painter, and model for many of the Pre-Raphaelite Brotherhood painters. Most famous for modelling for the painting of “Ophelia” by Sir John Everett Millais, and the painting of her husband, Dante Gabriel Rossetti, titled “Beata Beatrix”.
While posing for “Ophelia” she sat in a bath of water kept warm by lamps underneath. Once the lamps went out and the water became icy cold, but Siddal did not complain to Millais who was to engrossed in his painting to notice. She developed pneumonia because of this and her father held Millais responsible and demanded he pay for her care.
(When studying The Brotherhood last year I was taken with how beautiful Elizabeth Siddal was, and can certainly see why The Brotherhood were keen to keep her around.)
The first woman to ask for divorce and lead an army, Eleanor of Aquitaine lived until she was 82 (pretty good considering most died in their 40s). She got a formal education, which was really rare for women in that era. There are rumours that she poisoned her second husband Henry II’s mistress, the Fair Rosamund.
This lady’s bad-ass.
"The Accolade" by Edmond Leighton. Why yes, I do have a print of this work on my wall.
“Holy heroin addicts in Detroit, Batman.”
I sorta fell of the APH bandwagon a few years back… Maybe I should try it again?